The idea for this material came to me after the fact that I thought a lot about some things that have been said to me lately. Things that surprised me, offended, outraged, but also amused. I refuse to victimize myself, especially since over time I have heard many malicious remarks and comments about my figure, I cannot say that my life has been affected too much. Maybe at the moment yes, but looking at the big picture, my life is beautiful, penciled as I wanted and how I could, so now if someone asked me, I could say from the heart that I am happy. It's not easy for me, but it's not extraordinarily hard for me either. I make an effort in all aspects of life and I do it as voluntarily as possible because I know what I work for.
But there are people who think they are superior just because they are weak. Or weaker than me. There are people who offend other people just because they can. And such people made the adjective fatty o insult. An insult that automatically nullifies your human quality, professionalism, talent, and the list goes on, but I refuse to do so. I remember and I know I've told you this before, that when I was a kid the biggest insult you could do to me was to tell me I was fat. I would accept it easier to tell myself that I was stupid than the simple evil Fat !. I'm not stupid by any means, but I'm fat and I know that. You didn't tell me anything new, but if this statement you made out loud makes you feel better, better or smarter, it's very sad. Believing yourself above just because you told a man that he is fat doesn't say much about your intelligence (neither mental nor emotional). And I can't deny that it reminds me of the episode in which another man working online attacked me with ugly insults telling me I can't be a beauty blogger because I'm fat. I can honestly say that I haven't forgotten the episode yet and I don't think I will be able to forget it too soon. I was quite affected then and it seems that even now I haven't completely got over it. I will let time pass and maybe in time I will be able to forgive completely.
I got bored of hearing and saying that people are different (and when I say that I don't mean only to the physical appearance). But it would be nice to accept our diversity. We would be more relaxed, happier, more united and we would no longer feel alone, sad or simply overwhelmed by certain situations.
We are different.
So in the order in which I remember them, I want to tell you a few things that I have heard and still hear, and that to a greater or lesser extent have marked me. Maybe you even said one of the things below to someone else and you didn't realize how that person might feel. And on this occasion I allow myself to answer exactly as I would have liked many times, but the common sense and education received in the family did not allow me.
- Yesterday I received the following message on Instagram: Hi, Ioana! I also need an answer that is as honest as possible. Do you know how to recommend me some slimming pills that will take effect quickly? I know they're not exactly good, but I'm assuming I'll buy a box or two.
I remained a mask. Seriously? I've been breaking my ass at the gym 5 times a week for so many years and I'm climbing my food so you can ask me about diet pills? Does my figure look like one who took pills? I lost tens of kilograms overnight and I don't want to share the secret with you? Honestly, the question offends me.
- You are a complex!
On top of that, I received this comment opposite a picture of me in a swimsuit. Honestly, I also have my own complexes and there are things I would like to improve, but that doesn't mean I don't go on vacation, I don't wear a swimsuit and I don't take pictures. What should I wear to the sea to make others feel better on my vacation, a coat? Or should fat people just go to the mountains? I'm not asking for a friend, but for me because I really like going to the sea and I want to know if I should keep in touch with the girl above that she can find those slimming pills and I'm also able to go to the sea.
- What else do you like about food!
Yes! You do not like? In addition to the hormonal problems that triggered my weight gain, I admit that I am also greedy and that I like to eat. But most people find pleasure in food. I'm not special, you're a mitochondrion.
- Leave the shaorma!
This line is most often told by men. Shaorma-eating men, as evidenced by the fact that they only think of her. The pot calls the kettle black. I don't particularly like shaorma. It would be more correct to say what else do you like french fries, but the shaorma is not on my wish list. And in order to sell another tip to shaorma eaters, most of the time it is not what we eat that influences our weight, but how much we eat. It would be interesting to do an experiment in which to eat shaorma every week and lose weight, right?
- Why don't you have stomach surgery?
But how can you hold me accountable for such an intimate decision? An operation is not as simple as a manicure. If it was the case of a critical situation and came to the doctor's recommendation, maybe I would have considered this option.
- Who am I, that fat one ?!
Did you see Ioana get x award in beauty? It doesn't matter what success you have, as long as you are fat you have them in vain. For some.
This reminds me of a picture I saw posted on the Instagram account of the editor-in-chief of The ONE magazine (just as I was writing for that magazine) and who is now a beauty editor at another glossy Harper's BAZAAR magazine. . I leave it below with the thought that if the people who should form opinions think so, we really can't have too high expectations from others.
- How fat you are!
Come on, you can do more than that. Please focus. What else do you notice? Nothing? Really nothing? Okay, then that's how your head goes.
The bottom line is that we are still and will be different. We look, think, feel and behave differently. And it's okay. Being bad and ignorant is not okay. Not to mention that everything is a mirror. If you are bad with others, it means that you are bad with yourself, that you have an extremely bad opinion of yourself and that the real problem is there.